Thinking of ditching the diapers and potty training your little boy? It’s exciting to dive into the process, in part because it’s a huge developmental milestone for your toddler. And, let’s face it, by now you’ve been changing diapers for two years (or longer!) and are likely ready to retire the chore.
As you start thinking about potty training your little boy, don’t fall for tired gendered stereotypes. Being male isn’t necessarily the reason your son may train later than his sister, though a few large studies have found that boys on average are potty trained six months later than girls, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).[1]
But all kids are different, and several factors impact their interest in training. Your best bet is to focus on your son’s physical and emotional readiness and take it from there.
When to get started potty training a toddler boy
If you’re looking for a hard-and-fast answer as to when to start potty training a toddler boy, you’ll be a bit disappointed. In truth, when to begin shedding diapers and using a kiddie potty doesn’t hinge solely on age, according to the AAP.[2]
While many toddlers will show signs of being ready to potty train between 18 and 24 months, some boys may not be up for this task until they’re closer to age 3. The average age for girls to master potty training is 35 months, while for boys it's 39 months.
"Some boys will potty train as soon or sooner than girls, so if your son starts using words for going potty or telling you after he’s already gone, he might be ready," explains Gina Posner, M.D., F.A.A.P., a board-certified pediatrician at MemorialCare Medical Group in Fountain Valley, California, and a member of the What to Expect Medical Review Board.
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You can gauge your child’s readiness to potty train by watching for some of the more common signs, including staying dryer for longer, having predictable bowel movements, and using the right words, albeit in his own adorable tot-speak (“My poop big!”).
If your little boy is also able to pull down his pants and underwear by himself, he’s probably ready to try the potty, says the Mayo Clinic.[3]
Tips for potty training boys
If your little guy has some of the above readiness signs, understands basic directions, and can tell you he needs to go, give the process a try. Here are some potty-training tips for boys:
Hit the store. If your little boy seems interested, let him tag along when you buy a training seat or mini potty for him. He might also love to choose toddler wipes and big-boy underwear in his favorite color, or ones with a theme like dinosaurs or smiley faces.
Try the equipment. Place the seat or potty in the bathroom and have your tot sit on it in clothes. He can also help empty it into the larger toilet and flush (that’s the fun part!).
Decide on your terms. Will you teach him words like urine and stool? Or use pee and poo? Both types are perfectly fine (just don’t use negative terms like stinky, dirty, or yucky).
Read all about it. Toddler storybooks about learning to use the potty may help along the way. And if you're comfortable, you could let your son watch when you go so he gets the hang of the process.
Choose easy clothes. Potty training clothes for boys shouldn’t include a belt in his jeans or overalls with clips. Instead, pick quick-to-yank-off pants or shorts with an elastic waist.
Watch for clues. Does your little boy start to hold himself or make noises when he has to go? Or does he retreat to a corner? Catch him when it happens and put him on the potty.
Bare it all. Going around the house with no bottoms on may help your tot tap into his body’s signals. And being clothes-free, at least from the waist down, makes going easier since there's nothing to take off.
Try disposable training pants. They’re a great in-between stage because they’ll corral accidents. But they can still be pulled up and down like cloth underwear.
Sit, then stand. When potty training your son, start in the sitting position for both peeing and pooping. Once he masters the potty seated, he can try standing up to pee. "I know parents who tried standing at first with their son and the pee got all over the wall and floor," shares What to Expect Community mom fleur-de-lis.
Aim carefully. Coach him to point his penis down into the toilet. And when he moves to standing up, he can have fun directing his stream to bits of toilet paper. "I like putting Cheerios in the water so boys aim for them, but it can be a little messy," says Dr. Posner.
Learn the rules. Instruct your little guy to raise the seat if he’s standing to pee, and then gently lower it when finished. Make sure he doesn't just hold the seat while he's going to the bathroom, but actually puts it all the way up, as it can clamp down on him and really hurt. Teach him to put the seat down slowly when he's done so it doesn't accidentally fall on him. Supervise your tot in case he has trouble. Flushing comes next, then thorough handwashing.
Offer lots of praise. Be effusive when your son makes it to the potty on time and hits his mark. And if stickers or small rewards help to motivate him, dole those out. A potty training chart to track his progress can also be useful.
Be calm. Know that accidents are a part of potty training for boys (and girls!), so try to roll with each one using humor and encouragement. Strive to be calm and not lose your cool. Peeing was a success for What to Expect Community mom rainbowbaby823 when she trained her son at 19 months. "But now we’re having more poop accidents even though he can and does poop in the potty," she relates.
Don’t fight it. If there are tears or other stress surrounding the potty process, take a break for a little while. And check to see if any outside factors could be impacting your efforts, such as the arrival of a sibling, a different sitter, a vacation, or moving to a new house. Dr. Posner adds that if your little boy isn’t having much success, wait until he shows some more signs. "I tell parents that it’s a losing battle if the child just isn’t ready," she shares.
Get more tips on how to potty train your little one in the What to Expect app, and chat with other parents about what's working for them.
When can boys learn to go to the potty standing up?
Once he has a handle on peeing and pooping while sitting on the potty, he can then move to the standing position when he has to pee. If he’s fidgety while sitting, offer a book to look at or something to play with while he tries to go.
If once he's ready to stand, your little guy can’t quite reach over the toilet with enough clearance to aim his stream into the water, offer a small stool for him to step up on.
How long does it take to potty train a boy?
Since every child is different, the length of time it takes to potty train will vary. For the most part, you can expect the potty-training process to last between three and six months, though some kids will take more or less time to shed their daytime diapers. As for staying dry overnight, that can take several more months or even years to achieve.
You can always check in with the doctor if you’re concerned about your little boy's potty-training progress, especially if he’s 4 or older and isn’t out of diapers yet.
As you start potty training your toddler son, keep in mind that lots of patience is an important part of the job. Be matter-of-fact about setbacks and keep praising him, even if he doesn’t produce each time he sits on the potty. Before you know it, your big boy will be using the potty like a pro.
- Boys tend to train later than girls. Most boys will potty train around age 3, but some show readiness signs sooner like staying dryer for longer and understanding the body’s cues.
- Be patient when potty training. You’ll likely spend three to six months trying to successfully train your son, so aim for calmness and positivity and ease off for a bit if it’s not going well.
- Keep the process light and fun. Take a trip to the store for cute underwear, let your little boy practice while clothed, and offer rewards when he goes in the potty.
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